Where did my dreams go?

It was a blissful weekend, I suppose. I realize that as I grow older ( and wiser, hopefully), good time, fantastic time, blast of a time; all these are moments when you find yourself entirely at peace and clam without any mishaps and bad news, or unexpected/unwanted chores and visitors.

There was a time, when you have to go out of the house, get out of the comfort our homes provide to experience life. Life is out there, somewhere unknown, and you have to leave behind what you know and have to seek the unknown thing called LIFE.

Few years down the road, battered and bruised and all the wiser, you realize that life has always been there, waiting right home. Or rather, home is wherever you find LIFE is.

I remember a time when I use to have these mental pictures of me being single (or attached, whichever convenient) in my own condominium (yes, condo, because it’s so much appealing back here in my country, compared to the idea of an apartment) with a group of like-minded friends to hang out with, social events to attend every week and a high flying career.

I shared these and some other wild ideas with my friends, and some thought I’m crazy.

Perhaps I was.

Nevertheless, over the years, the idealism faded. The thought of being alone in a house (or cohabitation either) did not appeal to me after my varsity years. I yearned for the company of my father and the food that my mother gives. I enjoyed watching movies at home, but avoided having a TV in my rented house.

Work started, and I didn’t really find like-minded friends; previous friends were all shattered everywhere, and the exposure to working culture in the corporate world shared its own ups and downs. I was still in my nest and never intended to leave anytime soon.

On the other hand, courtship was progressing, well, progressively and it was just a matter of time before prince charming swept me off the feet to several islands, in between tying the knot and learning the new chapter in life.

So where did my dreams and ideas fit in?

They didn’t.

But I dare say, honestly, I don’t regret any of it, either.

I lived every moment through and still doing so, every minute.

Even if I’m lazing off the desk sleepily while typing with more mistakes than correct words, I still enjoy the quiet, lazy moments.

I created my own moments, despite having dreamt of something else and chose to abandon them entirely, I am happy that those ideas steered me clearly towards what I have today, and now. I’m glad I didn’t jump into something just because I fantasized them over repeat shows of Ally Mcbeal and Sex in the City. There, I confessed.

I am also glad that some of the friends who called me crazy are actually living the ideas I created back then. With smiling faces and dimwitted remarks they post on social networks on how they “acquired” the dreams and ideas since school days.

Guess I’m a creative and inspiring person, after all. J

I’m glad I found my home, and realized where my life lies as well. Perfect.